Over the last couple of months, I’ve read a number of blog posts that have spoken of going slow during the colder weather. Hibernating for the winter, retreating inside our cosy, warm homes. Instead of rushing a-mile-a-minute, focussing on warming and nourishing food and drink, spending lazy time with our loved ones, reading, resting, and working on our own desires and projects. A time to look inwards and care for ourselves, figuring out what we really want, and giving ourselves time. Everything slowly.
This theme has mirrored my winter outlook this year. I’m usually the kind of person to actively seek out a challenge, to constantly be learning, looking for ways to be busy. Not this year. Over winter, I’ve taken this slowness under my wing. There have been times where opportunities have risen in front of me, and I’ve been tempted to embrace them. But instead I’ve stood back, looked them over, said “No thanks, not now” and walked away. And it has felt really good, a real relief.
Instead I’ve been sleeping in until the last possible moment. Lingering over my morning coffee and toast. Staying in pyjamas until lunchtime. Holding Little R and just looking at him, and talking to him. Listening to the peace and quiet, or the wind, or the rain. Teaching myself more knitting stitches and techniques, and knitting a new scarf. Reading. Tidying up the garden. Baking with Moose. Catching up on TV. Writing in my journal.
I’m on maternity leave and will be until May next year. Right now, my only job is to look after my children, primarily Little R. That is it. I have no other obligations for that period of time. My sole purpose is to be a Mum. And it feels wholesome, it makes me happy. And it gives me time to pursue the other little creative tidbits that I’ve longed to but hadn’t had the time to. I won’t ever have this time again, not with Little R, not with any more babies because he is our last. I have nothing but time, and I plan on embracing it.